Morals? I be having it!

My walking time is supposedly my thinking time, but since my wanders a lot, it’s a bit difficult to form coherent thought threads. Today on my way to work I started off thinking about how I should try to write another blog post today, and then wandered off on various ideas for topics. I was going to write about my cat (which I definitely will do at some stage in the near future), briefly considered writing something about the rugby world cup (which would be pointless as I know very little about the game and the guys aren’t really all that hot), then I thought I should write about my quest for physical perfection in myself (huh!), and somehow I got around to the subject of men and my lack of one. This is not really surprising, considering that it’s one of the main themes of my life at the moment.

A little while ago I had a quasi-sexual encounter with a near-stranger. This is not nearly as slutty as it sounds, when you factor in that I have had NO encounters of any kind for more than 5 years. No, that is not a typo. Before this one, the last time that a guy had come near me was in February of 2006.

Anyway, the upshot of this tacky and singularly unfulfilling encounter was that I discovered a few truths about myself. It was pointed out to me by the non-gentleman in question that I do not behave like a thirty-two year old woman of the world, and this was made to sound like a bad thing. Yes, I am somewhat prudish about sex (unless you ply me with enough alcohol, in which case I can be quite forthcoming. I’ve cut down dramatically on my alcohol intake since 2006 also). I don’t think of this as a bad thing. I watch A LOT of movies, and in almost all of them, having regular sex seems to be a major motivating factor for almost all the characters. Pardon me for finding this a little sad and depressing. Can anyone explain to me what the purpose is of having multiple sexual partners? How does this in any way improve your life? Yes, you know that you’re attractive, but to be honest that’s something that you should be able to determine from within yourself, not by constant attention from people who are only interested in you because you’re willing to get naked.

Why is it that taking a moral stand is so anathema in today’s society? Fifty years ago I would have been ostracised as a “low woman” for the (relatively few) number of sexual partners that I have had, but today I am scorned as a prude for the same reason. Is the drive toward promiscuity merely a rebellious reaction to the mores of the previous generations? If so, that is a very bad reason to jeopardise one’s health, both physically and emotionally.

And since I know what you’re probably thinking, let me tell you right now that yes, I am frustrated, but that is not going to cause me to lower my standards for a prospective partner.

Also, it is not a bad thing to want to get to know someone before sleeping with them. I’m often initially attracted to someone physically, only to find out that they have zero cognitive ability, which immediately turns me off. The people that I have been the most involved with have always been those who could stimulate me mentally as well as physically. On this subject, three dates does NOT fulfil my requirements for acquainting myself with the finer points of someone’s personality. And being able to have an interesting conversation is way more important to me than the size of his biceps.